Eureka?

22 May

Visceral reactions are fantastically nifty.

I am a fan of blogs.  I subscribe to a few (a lot, actually.  You should see my bookmarks for blogs, it’s a bit out of control actually), and read them daily if there is material to read.  Most of the time I smile as I read.  Sometimes, and these are the more striking times, I get annoyed/angry/frustrated/etc.  This used to make me close a window (and sometimes the computer) in a huff and stalk off grumbling (I take things personally sometimes, it’s a vice).  Today I find it interesting.

Through anger I will not admit it, but the writings (blog or not) that make me immeasurably angry are writings which inspire emotion.  Can an author ask more than that?  I am quite certain that some of the narratives that inspire negative reactions were meant to arouse the opposite response, but one can’t be too choosey.  Providing, of course, that a reader is not irritated to tears because of poor sentence structure and/or a terrible writing (lack of) style.

I am not negative by nature, but some things (and people) make me want to wander Dahmer’s garden path.  I shall endeavour to maintain as positive an outlook as I can (without sacrificing myself), but I am not going to be ashamed of my negativity.  I value sarcasm and cynicism.  Always have.  This doesn’t define me, but it makes my life more interesting.  I am unique.  Quite like many others, but completely unlike them in my own right.  I think that I will stop thinking that I should apologize for being who, and what, I am.

Fuck ’em if they can’t take a joke.

Queen – Another One Bites the Dust

UNT.

(That was quite disjointed.  Suffice to say, I am tired and I have about twelve potential blog posts swimming ’round my poor rattled skull.  But really, you’ve read other posts here, you can’t expect too much by way of coherency from me.)

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12 Responses to “Eureka?”

  1. lahirondelle May 23, 2009 at 7:45 am #

    I hope this doesn’t mean my blog angered you, or more importantly that you misunderstood. I accept negativity, even embrace it – as I said it is a valuable part of a bigger process. Unless you can acknowledge your negative feelings you can’t grow. But I was afraid I was allowing it to dominate me. Being overly negative is for me as detrimental as being unrealistically positive. I have had a bad experience recently that forced me (in a rather ugly and painful way) to come to terms with that. *hugs*

  2. vyxen May 23, 2009 at 8:51 am #

    Goodness no. I wasn’t speaking of your most recent post at all. That made me smile, actually. I am always in awe of your personal journeys. The last paragraph of this post was in minor response to that as it has made me think. The last post is also, effectively, unrelated to the first two.

    🙂

    I stopped to think, after I read your post, that maybe I was too negative. But I still look at sunshine with a smile, I am still elated every time I attend a coffee date with a good friend, and a good book still leaves me thrilled and aching for more. I can be very negative, but only in certain, limited, things. What I need to learn is how to divorce myself from those feelings quickly so that they don’t mar that sunny day, or coffee date. Accept negativity, but don’t let it consume you. Truly.

  3. lahirondelle May 23, 2009 at 9:04 am #

    Yeah, I also see negative feelings as a message that I need to DEAL with something and not keep absorbing it and remaining superficially unaffected (whilst curling up into a ball inside). At work I have let people affect me (bombarding me with complaints and criticism) and just keep absorbing the blows with a smile. I had an ‘enough’ moment and cut a tie… it was hard to do, and I am still smarting, but the relationship was all about feeding on ill-will, and so I had to let it go.

  4. vyxen May 23, 2009 at 10:34 am #

    That is true, and is also the reason I have become a better communicator (with mephy) in recent years. If something is bothering me it will bother me until I deal with it. I am not generally equipped to deal with it myself, so I speak of my problems (which is, sometimes, enough) and request help in either understanding what is bothering me (sometimes I have no idea) or in working it out so that I either get over it, or begin to get over it.

    Some things I will never be able to get over. I have tried, and cannot. Plague. But it balances the overall good, so I’ll accept it. Plus? It makes me feisty and that’s never bad.

  5. lahirondelle May 23, 2009 at 10:43 am #

    a Eureka moment for both of us then ^^

  6. missyjo May 25, 2009 at 9:04 pm #

    I’m with you on this. I think, however, that ANY response, negative, even to the point of tears (except on the sentence structure lol) is good. Good writing is art. It NEEDS emotion, both behind it and before it. That is it’s purpose. Even BAD writing has a point, I think. I tend to vary so far between the points of really good, inspiring writing to really bad, disjointed, druggy writing that it’s hard to imagine the words came from one woman. However those of you who know me, and know my heart, and know my writing, know it’s me.

    I’ve been known to turn the computer off, walk away for DAYS because I was angry with something someone said. You all know that. But you have to stand behind it, stand up to it and for it, and always be willing to go back and re-examine it later, when your perspective might have changed. Because as we all grow, we always look at things differently. What drives you up a tree today, might merely make you smile and shake your head six months from now. Who knows? That’s the interesting thing about being human.

    Jeez…no more Star Trek for me. Makes me introspective and Vulcan. Argh!

  7. raekin May 26, 2009 at 7:18 am #

    Sarcasm and pessimism are two of my favourite things. I don’t think anyone should feel ashamed to feel those, no one can…or do I mean should…be expected to feel optimism and see everything through rose tinted spectacles all the time. And the people who make you feel shit probably don’t realise they’re doing it most of the time, a lot of them seem to be incapable of thinking outside themselves.

    I think you’re great. But you knew that anyway 😉

  8. vyxen May 28, 2009 at 7:24 am #

    That’s what I mean. Even foaming at the mouth kind of angry is a great response to a post. Heh, especially if that’s your goal in the beginning. It strikes me, now, that there is a blog I used to read that pisses me off on a very regular basis, but that (as far as I can tell) is not the author’s intent. But that blog, imo, falls into that poorly written (but in this case it’s not the writing so much as the lack of relevant research into any topic – all of which are quite meaty) category.

    I have learned, in recent years, not to reply to most things immediately. I need to calm down and gain perspective. I will result in being no better than what makes me annoyed if I reply rashly (which I still do on occasion. I’m human 😉 ).

    And Rae, you’re right. I don’t mean to be optimistic and rosey 24/7/365, but I do need to take a look at how negativity is affecting me and my moods/day. As I have said, I greatly value some things that are viewed as negative and negativity itself presents balance to positivity. Hugely important. Balance is key.

  9. onegirlriot May 28, 2009 at 9:25 am #

    LMFAO @ “wander[ing] Dahmer’s garden path.” Terrible writing does that to me.

    I found you via a post somewhere in networked blogs, btw, and I’m glad I did.

    My blog’s focused on writing, but once in a while I find something off-topic that is irresistible. Here are two posts that might entertain you:

    http://onegirlriot.wordpress.com/2009/05/22/offshore-milk/
    http://onegirlriot.wordpress.com/2009/05/21/regain-your-hymen/

    Adding you to my blogroll. Pleased to meet you. 🙂

  10. vyxen May 28, 2009 at 1:13 pm #

    Oh wow! Thank you, so much. I’m glad you stumbled over my way. 🙂 I will definitely be checking out your blog, thanks for the linkage!

    Have a great one! 🙂

  11. songmistress June 1, 2009 at 3:20 am #

    From one who, apparently, lives to provoke… love this post, Kim. Brill. 🙂

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Emotion. « Prolifically Barren - June 3, 2009

    […] like those visceral reactions I spoke about earlier.  Reading, or viewing, something that leaves you feeling the way you felt when you approached it […]

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