(Image @ Carhartts and Coach Bags)
I bid a fond adieu to my twenties the other day.
No. I shouldn’t say it like that.
I booted my twenties out the door and hollered a chipper “good riddance!” the other day.
It’s not that I didn’t enjoy my twenties, I actually really did. I accomplished a lot in ten short years. That does not mean, however, that I have not been looking forward to turning thirty for some time now. However foolish it may read, thirty seemed like a great idea to me. Functional adulthood. Open doors. A sturdy foundation for the ever elusive Self.
As “they” say it wasn’t until I hit my mid-to-late twenties that I started to develop an understanding not only of my life, but of my Self. It was then when I started to take all of the building blocks I had been given through my life – all of my experiences, hopes, dreams, mistakes, and education (inside the classroom and out) – and use them to construct a hasty groundwork. A groundwork that, like the first draft of any piece of writing, would be toiled over, deconstructed, reconstructed, scribbled on, and begun anew several times over, until it started to feel comfortable.
This meant job changes, relationship metamorphoses, drama, failure, and success. Life. This meant life.
It hasn’t been easy. There are days I’m surprised that I’ve made it this far, and there are days I doubt I’ll make it to tomorrow. I don’t expect it to get any easier as I go along either, but I feel more prepared. Every learning opportunity I encounter is another stepping stone on a very interesting garden path.
I am excited for this chapter of my life not because I feel it is some magical door through which an easily attained Utopia lies, but because things have gotten interesting lately. I know myself more intimately than I ever have before. If I am unhappy, I will make changes. I will make fewer concessions. I expect to stumble and I know I can pick myself up and that wounds will heal. I want what I want, I like what I like, I love who I love, and I will neither feel shame nor apologize for that.
My thirties are going to be badass. I am going to be badass. Life is going to be badass.
So folks, how’re things?